Turns Out I Was Wrong

This morning I am thinking about how my notion of true love has evolved since my childhood.  I had the blessed curse of growing up watching Rodgers and Hammerstein’s “Cinderella” every year, religiously.  I really bought into that fairytale musical hook, line, and sinker.  There was one song in particular that always had me mesmerized.  I can still remember some of the lyrics:

“Do I love you because you’re wonderful, or are you wonderful because I love you?—Are you the

     sweet invention of a lover’s dream, or are you really as wonderful as you seem?”

 Okay, so seeing those words right now makes me want to barf a little.  But, oh how they used to stir my prepubescent heart!  I was certain that someday I would meet a handsome prince, and we would fall in love and get married.  In a bit of a departure from the traditional Cinderella story line, I was going to be a successful doctor.  A pediatrician.  Still, somehow I would manage to welcome my prince home from work each and every day with hugs, kisses, and a home cooked meal.  I would be perpetually young, delightful and as cute as could be.  He would be strong, passionate, kind, and ever so handsome.  And we would live happily ever after.  I have to laugh as I recall how, at the time, my greatest fear related to love was that one day, inevitably, a tampon commercial would be shown while I was watching television with my handsome prince.  After all, love was about everything being just perfect.  Or so I thought.  Well, it turns out I was wrong.  I did actually meet a prince…and another, and another.  They were strong, passionate, kind, and handsome.  Well, sometimes.  But, just like in the classic fairy tale, the initial magic always wore off after a while.  This faltering magic didn’t exactly cause them to turn into pumpkins.  Rather, it caused them to disappear. And I wasn’t a pediatrician.  Instead, I was a teacher and a single parent.  Most days when I got home from work, I felt anything but young, delightful, or cute.  Heck, I often thought how nice it would be to have a prince waiting at home with hugs, kisses, and a home cooked meal for me!  By then, my greatest fear related to love had nothing to do with embarrassment about feminine products.  Quite honestly, it was that my prince had missed me.  I wondered:  What if he encountered me, but didn’t really see me?  What if he was looking for the perfect, polished princess Cinderella and was thrown off when he met me prior to my fabulous fairy godmother makeover?  What if he ended up marrying one of my wicked step-sisters?  After all, love was all about perfect circumstances and timing.  Or so I thought.  Turns out I was wrong again.  It turns out I’ve never quite made it to Happily Ever After.  I have, however, taken up residence in a wonderful place called Happily-Right-Now.  Most days when I get home from work, it is well past dinner time.  When I do make a home cooked meal, I sit across the table from the empty place where no handsome prince is.  But I envision him being there someday.  I envision our conversation and laughter over meals that we have both prepared.  I envision his strength and passion, which are genuine…flowing from a beautiful heart rather than merely shining as an illusion from a handsome face.  I envision us getting married, living, learning, growing, trying, questioning, figuring things out, and moving forward...together.  After all, I no longer believe that love is about being perfect.  I now believe it is about being perfected through commitment, real intimacy and truth.  And my greatest fear related to love?  There is none.  There is only joy and gratitude as I receive its unfolding manifestation to me each day.