Take Time

I am thinking about the last time I saw my dad.  It was December, just before the winter break during my sophomore year of college.  He had called me earlier that day to ask how things were going with my final exams and a term paper that I was writing.  Something in my words or my tone (or maybe both) must have signaled to him that I was stressed and needed a break because, in about an hour, he was knocking on the door of my dorm.  “Come on.  I’m going fishing,” he beckoned.  I thought about how much I had to do, and I said, “No.  I need to work.”  Seemingly undaunted, he just said, “Okay,” and off he went…to fish from the seawall outside the window of my dorm…right where I could see him.  After he placed his tackle box on the ground, he turned to look at me, smiling and waving.  I remember the overwhelming love and appreciation I felt for him at that moment!  I got up from my chair, headed outside, and walked out across the field to join him.  I sat on the wall with my legs dangling over, and we talked and laughed for hours while he fished.  It is a memory I will always hold as precious in my heart.

I can still vividly recall the shock and sense of devastation I felt when, just a few days later, I was given the news that he had passed away suddenly, unexpectedly.   In the days, weeks, and months following his death, I cannot count the number of times I asked myself, “What if I hadn’t taken the time to go out and sit with him that day?”  Even in the midst of overwhelming heartbreak, I derived some measure of comfort and peace from at least being on the good side of “what if.” If there’s one thing I have learned over the years, it is that I am empowered to determine on which side of “what if” I will be if a treasured relationship ends, for whatever reason.  I have the choice to show my genuine thankfulness and appreciation for the people in my life who truly matter.  So, I no longer use the cop-out that I “wasn’t able to make time.”  Of course I can’t make time.  Only God can do that.  But, what I can do…what I will do…is take time for those who mean so much in my life.  Be it to laugh or learn, to shop or share, to encourage or embrace, to pray or play—for those I love, I will always take time.